The Israel Supporter And The Sandwich

Israel supporter: [Walks up to a guy at a restaurant, grabs his sandwich, starts eating it.]

Guy: Hey!

Israel supporter: What?

Guy: That’s my sandwich!

Israel supporter [still eating]: Sandwich? What sandwich?

Guy: Right there! You’re eating it right now!

Israel supporter: No I’m not.

Guy: Oh my God! You’re standing right in front of me eating my sandwich! I can see you doing it with my own eyes!

Israel supporter [finishing sandwich]: Nope. Never happened.

Guy: You owe me another sandwich you prick! You stole from me!

Israel supporter: So you’re saying Jews steal? That’s an anti-semitic canard!

Guy: What?? I didn’t even know what religion you are! I’m just mad you stole my sandwich and ate it right in front of me!

Israel supporter: That never happened. Or if it did happen it wasn’t me. Or if it was me I had to do it because another guy did something that left me no choice, so you should blame him.

Guy: Gah!!

Israel supporter: Actually come to think of it I’m beginning to suspect maybe YOU ate MY sandwich.

Guy: How is this happening? This is ridiculous!

Israel supporter: Again with the Jew hating!

Guy: Why the hell do you keep babbling about Jews?? This has nothing to do with Jews! This is about you personally and the specific thing you just did!

Israel supporter: Okay Hitler. [Steals silverware on the table, exits.]

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